So the following post will include some visual and story spoilers for the seminal 1990s Television Anime series Neon Genesis Evangelion. I have a lot to say about Evangelion, a lot of it good and a lot of it bad, but that is the subject of a post for another day. Today I want to focus on something entirely more ridiculous than Evangelion’s usual fare of mentally unstable teenagers, giant bio-titans, and eldritch monsters from beyond our understanding.

I want to talk about this image captured from the show:

Seriously, spoiler (And a bit gruesome) Last warning.

 

NAauxkU

This is the graveyard of failed Evangelions kept in Terminal Dogma deep within the bowels of NERV HQ. It is also so ridiculous that it positively boggles the mind. And I love how absolutely bonkers it is.

Look at the scale. Assuming those skulls match the (Admittedly inconsistent but undoubtedly huge) head of an Evangelion unit, that chamber is kilometers long and a kilometer high at least.

I realize that Gendo has a lot of pull and influence, I realize Seele created Terminal Dogma to hold the imprisoned pseudo-corpse of what is basically a bleeding god. But why does this exist? Who built it? A place of that scale can’t exactly be built by one half-mad Japanese guy and a cadre of floating Monoliths from 2001. It would take an army of dedicated contractors. Can you imagine the conversations involved?

“We need you to build this impossibly huge chamber, with holes a hundred meters deep shaped into the image of this ambiguously religious symbol”

“Uh…why?”

“None of your goddamn business that’s why.”

See, the top secret chamber holding Lilith makes sense. It serves a purpose (Produce LCL and keep Lilith where they want it). The infamous Rei-quarium makes sense (Make more Reis) but why does this place even exist? It’s explicitly called a dumping ground, but if you’re just trying to get rid of discarded EVA corpses there has to be a slightly less ostentatious and ludicrous way to do it.

Even assuming that they needed to be kept secret and dumped in a sealed area due to hazardous waste, there has to be a better way. Can you imagine if the US government decided to store nuclear waste in an underground metal chamber in open pits shaped into a pseudo-religious icon?

What is that anyway? Some kind of cross mixed with a Sefirot?

It can’t be sanitary either. Those are just open pits for the (mostly flesh) Evangelions to rot. Imagine skyscrapers of meat just festering away in some underground facility. Can you imagine the disease? Can you imagine the smell?

I realize this is one of those moments for the MST3K mantra. It is just a show. But while Evangelion tends to revel in this kind of thing (Cross-shaped laser beams, let’s not forget). This is a scene that stands out as absurd even on their scale of acceptably absurd that I give them. This is the kind of thing I expect from Warhammer 40K on the scale of over-sized and pointless religious iconography.

 

 

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